The Cup

Sometimes in life, the cup is half-empty, sometimes it is half-full, sometimes it runneth-over, and sometimes it is bone dry. I’d like to say it is all in a person’s perspective, but I don’t really believe that. I do, however, believe that sometimes, life hands a person a set of circumstances and those circumstances define themselves and all the person can do is deal with the cup they are dealt. That is not always a negative thing, but it is not always positive either. It all depends on what is in the cup and what you do with it.

Tag: health

  • Post #10: 8/7/25

    Post #10: 8/7/25

    Cup Status: Filling Up, But Confused About Why

    So, I’ve really been thinking lately about why I feel more comfortable and like myself when I am busy and have deadlines and am, for lack of a better word, stressed. Why is it that I seem to thrive on stress? Why is my baseline for normal filled with a racing heart, shallow breathing, a pounding headache, and reminders to just breathe? The closer I get to the start of school, the closer I get to all of the deadlines, the more alive I feel. This just feels weird. I was in a therapy session recently and my therapist gave me a deck of cards that had different words that represent needs on them such as “valued” and “loved” and “respected” and others such as “creative” and “financial security”. He asked me to organize them however I wanted to in order to categorize them to show where those needs are currently being met, at least according to me. I decided on three categories: family/home, friends, and work. I started putting cards in piles and it soon became apparent that I have most of my needs met at work. When I looked closer at the needs that are being met at work, I realized that many of them could, and probably should, be met in different ways in my personal life, if only I let them. But then, I hear my therapist saying, don’t should all over your life. So instead, I will say, that I will be finding other ways to meet the needs that work is currently the only place that is meeting them. For example, “creativity.” I used to love scrapbooking, but I haven’t done it in 15 years despite having all of the supplies to enjoy the hobby. “Growth” is another need that gets met at work, but at home, I am not sure where I can grow at home. I am looking for ways to do this, besides literally growing food in my garden. The problem is, shifting my mindset and trying to live this different way seems impossible. I don’t even know where to start or how to do this. So, I do what I do best and I start researching. As a starting point, here is what I have found so far thanks to the article “CALM IS A CHOICE – STRESS IS A CHOICE”(https://martawilson.com/calm-is-a-choice/), “The brain chemicals that generate enthusiasm for a challenge are different from those that generate fear of a threat. And in many cases, whether we experience enthusiasm or fear is a matter of choice. We can choose attitudes that challenge, motivate and mobilize us, and that bring out the best in us. In other words, we can circumvent the fight or flight impulse by choosing to feel neither. How? By changing how we think.” It’s that idea of choosing how to think that confuses me. We can choose a new attitude. But, sometimes when we are in the middle of the stressful situation or the challenge facing us is so daunting, that can seem impossible. It is, however, something that I am going to actively try because I hope to get to where this next portion describes, “Eventually, we learn how to choose so our bodies don’t click into a fight or flight response at all. When we take responsibility for our assumptions, we begin to break the cycle of stress and become free to face seeming threats with energy and enthusiasm. What’s required is a conscious mental shift in how we view our world. What’s required is a change in attitude.” Not everything requires fight or flight. I need to remember that. A challenge can be exciting. It doesn’t have to soul crushing or migraine inducing, right? This will definitely be an uphill climb, but I am going to try to begin it with a positive attitude.

  • Post #3: 7/28/25

    Post #3: 7/28/25

    Cup Status: It’s Complicated

    So, I started the day out with my 6th month cleaning at the dentist. Thankfully, I had a good report. Go, me! But, as I lay in the chair repeating this mantra, “It is just a spa day for your teeth. Just a spa day for your teeth. Just a spa day for your teeth…” to help keep my mind off of the sounds and sensations of 6 months of unintentionally missed build-up. This led me to think about how I wish that I could have a spa day for my stress. It would be so nice to open up my brain for a few moments and have someone swipe a little cleanser on there and then give it a buff with a swirly, high power brush to clean away the stresses of life one layer at a time. Then, after that portion, I would love to open up my heart and have someone use the high pressure water tool to spray away the pains and heartaches that weigh so heavily on me lately. Then, I would use the pick tool to scrape away the tension that has built up on my shoulders and embedded itself deep into my neck. One speck at a time. Scrape. Scrape. Scrape. The shoulders rise higher. The neck lifts up. The head feels lighter than before. Then, finish it all up with the floss. Let’s move it between my fingers to loosen the stiffness between each joint and digit so that I can continue to work hard and push forward in life. The dentist comes in and checks the x-rays, the cleaning, the visual inspection is complete. No, visual damage. No damage under the surface can be detected by the x-rays. But, the damage is still there, because the cleaning was only on the surface and the X-rays only go so far. Every 6 months, (or sooner) there will need to be another deep de-stressing. Every day there will need to be maintenance de-stressing. Eventually, maybe, the deepest layers can be reached and scraped away, but for now, I will continue to buff, and spray, and scrape, and floss away what I can while still moving forward with life because as Ellis Grey says in Grey’s Anatomy, “The carousel never stops turning.” Although when I am saying it, I don’t mean that it is awful being an adult; it’s just really difficult sometimes. Sigh.